No one wants to experience a bad dream, and for good reason, too. No one wants to be left shaken up by a particuarly sick, twisted nightmare. It can turn a good morning into a grotesque morning, putting a damper on one’s day. Imagine, then, how I felt recently to have woken up into a nightmare. That’s right, this is the story of how I lost my AirPods in my sleep. Picture it: you’re regaining consciousness slowly, luxuriating in the normalcy of morning, when suddenly you have the rug ripped out from under you. In this case, my AirPods had been ripped out from my unsuspecting, unassuming ear canals.
My AirPods are my children. I practically gave birth to them, and I have the hearing damage to prove it. Thus, having them taken away from me is nothing less than a life-altering event. During the day, everything’s fine. We share a mutually beneficial and tight-knit bond. We provide one another with each other’s missing puzzle piece, if that makes sense. Something about us just feels right.
Nighttime, however, is when Airon and Airiel start to grow distant. They become uncomfortable in my ear as I’m laying on my side, waiting for slumber. To compensate, I remove one of them depending on the situation and tuck them into their charging/carrying case. One of them takes the night shift, and the other gets to replenish. That must be enough to appease them, right? Wrong. They always run away in the middle of the night, when I’m at my most vulnerable.
I know what you’re thinking, and yes, this is a problem that I have encountered many times and have chosen to actively ignore. It’s true, I could regroup. I could try to brainstorm a solution. I could try to install some fail-safe in order to evade any further trauma. But alas, that would require effort, and I’m extremely busy living, laughing, and loving. I’m a single mother of two AirPods, so having free time is a foreign concept to me.
That being said, my AirPods deserve their own Amber Alert. If we have to call it an Airon and Airiel Alert, The Delinquent AirPods Alert, anything at all – I don’t care. All I want is for my babies to actually stay with me throughout the night. I don’t think that’s too much to ask of Apple, do you? I know that they’re rich enough to fix this. They must be. Sound off in the comments below.